my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
How does it feel to date your dad?
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
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