I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
He is an equal opportunity slut.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
Randomize
