So it's 11:24am. I've had sex twice and been laid 3 times. I love holidays!
I understand the whole sex thing but did you really get laid or is that synonymous for more alcohol?????
Honestly.
Don't say a word.
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
Randomize
