ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
I want to have your abortion
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
Randomize
