he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
Randomize
