I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
Randomize
