how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Randomize
