Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
My night just got really weird. In a sit down stall bathroom at this nice resturaunt and this guy walks in as I rip a humongous porcelain-splitting fart. Well, I hear him stop for a second. He then opens the door to the stall next to mine, sits down and says, "player two has entered the game."
Did you win?
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Randomize