sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
Randomize
