Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
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