Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
I was just giving a mobile app demo to a client, on my iPhone, when a reminder alert appeared across the page blinking "12pm: go home and give John head". You're an asshole
Hahaha oops.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
Randomize
