omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
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