So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
apparently the secret to your success is patron
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
Randomize
