My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
