Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
I just threw up on my dentist
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
You made out with two different species that night
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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