My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
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