I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
Randomize
