last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
I supernannyed him into submission
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
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