you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
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Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
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And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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