did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
