like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
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