Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
