I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
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