I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
I'm experimenting with sincerity
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
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