Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
Randomize
