My grandmother just called to say she disowned me. Apparently I uploaded a video to Youtube of me dancing nude with a blow-up doll named Dorothy, last night. You are so fired from being damage control.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
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