My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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