I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
Randomize
