Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
