And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
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