I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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