my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
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