Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
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