on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
19 Teachers Share the Funniest Items Brought to “Show and Tell”
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
23 Concerns People Have When They’re About To Have Sex With Someone New
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"