So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
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