Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize
