Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
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