He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
Randomize
