State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize