Heybabeimwearingurpanties
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
