and you said cock pushups were impossible
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
After tacos, we're chasing women.
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
Randomize
