Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
Randomize
