Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(202): View more from Washington, DC

the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning

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(202): the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning http://tfl.nu/vrio

Replies (6) Good night (659) Bad night (1938)
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(780): View more from Alberta, CA

The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.

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(780): The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day. http://tfl.nu/xftd

Replies (20) Good night (5233) Bad night (1170)
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(518): View more from New York

I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.

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(518): I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often. http://tfl.nu/3lpk

Replies (40) Good night (5710) Bad night (1729)
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(724): View more from Pennsylvania

I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night

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(724): I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night http://tfl.nu/2zdr

Replies (8) Good night (4365) Bad night (748)
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(605): View more from South Dakota

im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am

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(605): im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am http://tfl.nu/dc3c

Replies (9) Good night (3290) Bad night (1157)
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(253): View more from Washington

In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.

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(253): In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me. http://tfl.nu/mf2b

Replies (11) Good night (2942) Bad night (781)
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(661): View more from California

1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.

(1-661): View more from California

1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up

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(661): 1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place. (1-661): 1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up http://tfl.nu/wu9m

Replies (12) Good night (4344) Bad night (977)
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(978): View more from Massachusetts

just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.

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(978): just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins. http://tfl.nu/d5im

Replies (4) Good night (1162) Bad night (494)
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(704): View more from North Carolina

Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.

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(704): Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second. http://tfl.nu/m6sh

Replies (5) Good night (913) Bad night (570)
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(417): View more from Missouri

You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make

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(417): You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make http://tfl.nu/3d29

Replies (5) Good night (2061) Bad night (618)
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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.

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(610): I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home. http://tfl.nu/onnq

Replies (1) Good night (778) Bad night (304)
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(302): View more from Delaware

Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...

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(302): Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week... http://tfl.nu/cclg

Replies (3) Good night (406) Bad night (712)
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(612): View more from Minnesota

Really? A fat girl?

(1-206): View more from Washington

I'm walking her back. Chill out.

(1-206): View more from Washington

She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.

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(612): Really? A fat girl? (1-206): I'm walking her back. Chill out. (1-206): She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though. http://tfl.nu/xw6d

Replies (19) Good night (743) Bad night (333)
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(619): View more from California

This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.

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(619): This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for. http://tfl.nu/6gu4

Replies (3) Good night (200) Bad night (388)
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(812): View more from Indiana

So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?

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(812): So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen? http://tfl.nu/td4f

Replies (3) Good night (285) Bad night (452)

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