i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
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