Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
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