dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Randomize
