And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
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