Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
i dont even know how to be here
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
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