..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
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