If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
Randomize
