listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
Some lady found my secret pooping bathroom at work. Do I fight her Highlander style? I made or may not be fashioning a crude sword from seat covers and toilet paper rolls.
Do it. DO IT. There can be only one.
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
The real estate's complaint had the words "loud squealing at 2am" in it. Then I remembered that was me spoon feeding you guys old potato salad while you screeched like baby birds. Great night.
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
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