grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize
